Visual Rewrite- bigcounrty609

Here is the video

0:01 There is a man doing push-ups on a floor. You notice he is wearing a plain white tee and the walls and floor look very plain. The room looks mostly dark except for a tad of sunlight showing on the floor in the background, most likely from a window. There is a leg to either a bed or table in the background. The room has an empty feeling to it already, possibly suggesting he is alone.

0:02-0:04 The man is now sitting up on the floor leaning against the wall. He’s throwing playing cards into an old coffee can. He is looking obviously bored and attempting to pass the time. The room and himself are still looking very plain. Although now the light seems to be shining on him as a spotlight and the rest of the room is dark. We have yet to see any type of furniture or anything else in the room. So far the room could be a prison cell for all we know. Is he being imprisoned in an empty room for a reason?

0:05-0:07 The man is now holding two pictures. He looks saddened while looking at the pictures. The pictures are of an attractive women and a nice looking car. He seems to be missing the items in the photos. We have noticed the man may be imprisoned, in this frame you notice a striped blue rug on the floor. He may be imprisoned in this room, although a nice rug wouldn’t be found in a jail cell. What room is this man being kept in?

0:07-0:11 The man continues to take part in boring activities, likely making attempts to pass the time. He plays the harmonica and is stacking matches. He is also shown crossing off the days of a calendar, confirming that he has been there for a while. He hits his head on the calendar in frustration. The camera is zoomed so you still cannot make out any furniture and are unable to tell what kind of room he is in.

0:12-0:16 The man is now throwing a ball against the wall, continuing to pass time. The camera zooms out a little bit and you can see that he is leaning on what looks like to be a bed. You can now see the window that was creating the light earlier in the video. It looks like a normal window that can be opened. If he were to be in prison there would most likely be bars on the window. He pauses and looks at an upward angle towards what could be the door. Maybe someone standing in the doorway got his attention. Is he finally going to get out of the room?

0:17-0:25 The person at his door was an older women, who seemed to be yelling at him. She was holding a laundry basket. He replies as if he was rolling his eyes. The camera finally zooms out so you are able to see the full room. It looks to be a little kids room, which is weird because the man is grown. Maybe the lady was his mother, which would make sense why she would be yelling at him. But why is his mother mad and is she forcing him to stay?

0:26-0:30 A graphic pops up saying “Buzzed, Busted, Broke” making you realized that the man must be a busted drunk driver. Now he is living in his old room with his parents and without his girlfriend and car. Conveying a strong message to never drink and drive.

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1 Response to Visual Rewrite- bigcounrty609

  1. davidbdale says:

    Bigcountry, your analysis seems to miss what I thought was obvious when I watched the video. It’s supposed to be funny. It sets up the clear expectation that the man is in jail, doing stereotypical prison pastimes. I admit I watched the video with sound, which started before I could mute it, so I heard the cheesy harmonica solo from the beginning. The joke becomes really obvious, of course, when Mom comes to the door with laundry, but even before that, the scene is clearly staged to “look like” jail time without actually looking like jail time. That’s a difficult balance for a filmmaker to hit, don’t you think?

    The question for you is whether the video pulls off the joke or not. If it looks too much like jail, viewers will feel unfairly tricked. On the other hand, if the room looks too much like a bedroom, nobody will think even for a second, that the guy is really in jail.

    Without sound, does the video manage the humor?
    With sound, is the “fakiness” of the setup clearer?
    Is it unfair of us to judge a video without its soundtrack?

    Please consider these comments as you revise this post all the way to your Portfolio.


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