rebuttal rewrite-frogs02

There Is No Getting Out of This

Obesity causes death. If obesity was a choice, it would be defined as a person who is lazy, a person who unfortunately ate too much and a person who has hardly exercised. However, obesity is not a choice and it does not always cause cancer. Cancer does not always have to develop from previous health conditions. In the Irish Times article, Why Obesity is Not a Choice, studies have shown that Europe has been “recently criticized for having the lowest EU level of public treatment for obesity, the cost of treating obesity-related diseases in Ireland is significant. It is estimated to reach an annual cost of €2.1 billion in five years, according to The Irish Society for Clinical Nutrition and Metabolism, as the links between obesity and heart disease, mental ill-health, cancers, respiratory problems, type 2 diabetes, and musculoskeletal conditions are well established. More than a million of us are living with a treatable disease.” This quote brings us to hope that obesity is treatable but in most cases, it is past the point of going back to a healthy body. To treat obesity, patients need to diet, exercise, practice mental health, therapy, along self-care. Diet programs may focus on what to eat more of and less of. However, the previous article that was stated shows that the studies focus “on portion size, fat content, protein and carbohydrates do not address the important issues surrounding weight loss.” To be able to determine the issues of weight loss, professional help is needed such as a Psychological perspective. The psychological perspective is to address the policy and to practice and research the priorities. A group of expert psychologists states that obesity is a complex problem that needs an understanding of the factors that can lie beneath the condition. The psychological impact of weight gain can determine whether treatment will be a success or failure.

There is no definite cause for why people get cancer and how it affects each patient differently. Society views obesity as an effect of a person’s life decisions. However, this statement is completely false. Once past the point of obesity, you are stuck, cancer has many other things that contribute to it besides obesity. Researchers discovered that weight loss pills will increase your risk of cancers. Obesity can be caused by hereditary genes, exposure to radiation, improper sleep or care of the body. Many cases of radiation cancers and unidentified crises in the world. For example, in Kyiv Oblast, Ukraine, where the Chernobyl nuclear power plant exploded and caused mass radiation across the city. This caused many to get cancer and till this day, that same radiation is in the ground. 

To say that obesity is the top two causes of cancer after research is fairly inaccurate. However, obesity is difficult to assess the independent effect of energy intake on cancer risk. Many sufficient pieces of evidence help support the role of physical activity in preventing cancers of the colon and breast. The association is stronger in men than in women for colon cancer and in postmenopausal than in premenopausal women for breast cancer. Obesity is not the only cause of cancer and obesity is not all entirely bad as society views it. 

Obesity is the second most common cause of cancer, tobacco is the leading cause. Not everyone who is obese will get cancer. Being overweight and obese can cause changes in the body that help lead to cancer. Previous studies suggest that noncancer events are playing an important role as the cause of death among individuals with specific cancers.  In a previous study, the CDC identified that an increased risk of death from non-cancer events among patients with cancer had longer survival, but data on specific noncancer events were limited. 

Studies have shown that with improved cancer survivorship, cardiovascular disease (CVD) and other noncancer events compete with cancer as the underlying cause of death, but the risks of mortality in competing-risk settings have not been well characterized. Cardiovascular disease (CVD) is a group of conditions that involve the heart and blood vessels. Common complications include heart attack, chest pain (angina), or stroke. The number of individuals living with a history of cancer has continued to increase. CVD deaths are varied by first cancer site, indicating increased risks after the first diagnosis of lung cancer, hematologic malignancy, and urinary tract cancer. For individuals with all cancers combined, CVD was the leading cause of competing mortality in both male and female patients with cancer. CVD can be caused by obesity. Men are more likely to be more active than women. Heart disease and weight loss are closely linked. Your risk for heart disease is associated with your weight. If you are overweight or obese, you may be at higher risk for the condition. Medical experts consider obesity to be major risk factors for both coronary heart disease and heart attack.

The rapid incline of weight and the over abuse of food results in a rapid decline of health and wellness such as type 2 diabetes, infertility, high blood pressure, heart disease, cancers (breast, colon, and endometrial), stroke, gallbladder disease, fatty liver disease, high cholesterol, sleep apnea, chronic lower back pain, arthritis, and osteoarthritis. Although these illnesses result from obesity and have many deaths, there is a positive side to obesity. For example, being obese can help a person not get a cold as easily, less restrictive diet, less chance of rheumatoid arthritis, dementia is less frequent, and it can help the immune system and beat sickness quicker. 

This article, Social and Environmental Factors Influencing Obesity, published by NCBI states that, “the extent of the information on individual, environmental, and social hierarchy constraints on obesity development, it is important to understand how these can merge with clinical care. It is evident that no one simple solution and effective care requires knowledge of these complex relationships and integration between the health system and the surrounding community.” The evidence for social and environmental factors that contribute to obesity is often underappreciated. Obesity prevalence is significantly associated with sex, racial-ethnic identity, and socioeconomic status, which creates complex relationships between each of these characteristics. Food availability remains an important factor of obesity and it relates to differences in prevalence seen across areas and higher rates of obesity within low socioeconomic status individuals.

Overall, the causes of cancer are undefined. Obesity is not a choice. Obesity can be a cause of cancer but that goes along with everything else in the world. Many other factors can lead to cancer. Weight loss supplements can increase risk of cancer. Cancer causes health issues. We need to find a cure for cancer.

References

Walsh, Geraldine. “Why Obesity Is Not a Choice.” The Irish Times, The Irish Times, 4 Dec. 2019, https://www.irishtimes.com/life-and-style/health-family/why-obesity-is-not-a-choice-1.4095580. 

Lee, Alexandra. “Social and Environmental Factors Influencing Obesity.” Endotext [Internet]., U.S. National Library of Medicine, 12 Oct. 2019, https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/books/NBK278977/. 

This entry was posted in frogs, Rebuttal Rewrite FA21. Bookmark the permalink.

2 Responses to rebuttal rewrite-frogs02

  1. davidbdale says:

    Your essay is full of information, frogs, but it’s very hard to follow. I don’t usually recommend starting with an outline, but in your case it may be essential. Otherwise, you don’t seem to be identifying your primary points clearly for each paragraph. And, speaking of paragraphs, your first one contains so many ideas it could easily be broken into several paragraphs.

    I suggest you start every paragraph with a very clear, and simply stated, topic sentence. Once you ground us in the main idea, we’ll be more receptive to the material you have to present to us. Don’t worry that your sentences sound too simple, or too straightforward, or not academic. I promise your work will benefit from the directness.

    Let’s take an example:

    To say that obesity is the top two causes of cancer after research is fairly inaccurate. However, obesity is difficult to assess the independent effect of energy intake on cancer risk. Many sufficient pieces of evidence help support the role of physical activity in preventing cancers of the colon and breast. The association is stronger in men than in women for colon cancer and in postmenopausal than in premenopausal women for breast cancer. Obesity is not the only cause of cancer and obesity is not all entirely bad as society views it.

    Your first sentence is unclear. How can obesity be “the top two” causes of cancer? Do you mean one of the top two? And if that’s true, do you know whether it’s the first or the second? Clearly the second, right? Otherwise, you would have said, “Obesity is the most common cause of cancer.” But you use that claim to say it’s inaccurate. Does that mean the data is unclear? Does it mean obesity is just a contributing cause to many cancers, causing you to dispute that it should be considered a major contributor or a common contributor? What’s inaccurate?

    Your second sentence has a serious syntax problem.What’s difficult to assess? Obesity? Or to what degree “energy intake” contributes to cancer risk? I THINK what you mean is: “The degree to which calorie intake contributes to cancer risk, independent of other factors, is difficult to assess.” There’s no room for obesity in that sentence.

    Your third sentence takes a serious detour into physical activity.Readers can accept that you’re considering several causes of cancer in one paragraph, but as a good guide, you need to prep them for the evidence.

    In your fourth sentence, you further develop the physical activity association with cancer. We’ve left calories and obesity behind now, and are feeling a little lost.

    In your final sentence, you return to obesity, describe it as “not the only cause of cancer,” and then claim it’s “not so bad.” I’m going to suggest that your last sentence would be a better first sentence. Watch how it prepares us for the rest:

    Obesity is not the only cause of cancer, and caloric intake is not the only cause of obesity. So it would be wrong to blame overeating for all or even most cancers. In fact, it’s difficult to asses how much obesity contributes to cancer risk independent of other causes. For example, the evidence shows that physical activity can prevent cancers, mostly colon cancer for men, and breast cancer for women, even more obviously for postmenopausal women.

    More broadly, what you’re looking for is good evidence that really large people are NOT more likely to develop cancers. Has anyone studied NFL linemen? They’re commonly 300 pounds or heavier and would qualify as obese by most definitions. But they’re physically very active and probably more fit than most smaller men. Does their obesity associate with more cancers? If not, you could reasonably conclude that the positive benefit of their strenuous exercise “outweighs” their massive size.

    I hope that’s helpful, frogs.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. frogs02 says:

    That is very helpful. I feel like my subject is so specific that I don’t know how to get it to 1000 words without including stuff that isn’t needed. I also am unsure if my rebuttal is correct for this argument. I was wondering if there is a better rebuttal that I could potentially write more about.

    Like

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s