Robust Verbs- Ziggy026

In Vancouver, heroin addicts are committing crimes to support their habits. Daily activities such as jobs, interactions, and relationships are hard to maintain because of the fact that they are using and have to do to get their hands on the drug. The “free heroin for addicts” program is unsuccessfully doing everything they can to stop this by are not stopping these addicts from using heroin. The program may fix the city, but not the addiction that these people face.

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2 Responses to Robust Verbs- Ziggy026

  1. davidbdale says:

    Good start, Ziggy. You cut out all the nonsense and fixed errors largely by purging the sentences that contained them. Your result is a strong first draft. NOW.

    Where are the Robust Verbs? Yours are:

    is

    are

    are using

    is doing

    may fix

    One suggestion. When you have to choose between saying that something IS A PROBLEM or describing the behavior and letting readers conclude that it’s a problem, you can either say:

    1. A huge problem in Vancouver is heroin addicts committing crimes to support their habits.
    or
    2. Heroin addicts have been mugging and burglarizing the citizens of Vancouver to support their addictions.

    Revise?

    Like

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